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Ms. Elaine Kneeous

Jennifer is a one in a million stay-at-home mom. (More like one OF a million stay at home moms!) She graduated from a liberal arts college but there is nothing liberal OR artsy about her. She is married to Kevin Fischer of This Just In, and together they have a beautiful young daughter Kyla Audrey. In no particular order she loves dogs, wine, a good bargain, her family, pizza, and entertaining. Follow her blog of all things miscellaneous including but not limited to cooking and baking, entertaining and party planning, being a mommy, and homekeeping.

No, really Michelle, I think my marriage is just fine...

Kevin & I have a very old-fashioned relationship when it comes to running our household.  He takes care of the man-chores like cutting the grass & shoveling the snow, and I take care of fun tasks like laundry & cleaning.  Even when I was working full time, I was still in charge of all things domestic.  (We do enjoy making meals together when grilling is involved though.  Then it becomes a family affair.)  However, MY full time job was ONE full time job that rarely required me to work over 40 hours.  HIS full time work schedule includes his 40-hour-a-week stint PLUS part-time responsibilities such as scoring & timing for Milwaukee Public School athletics, Public Announcing for college athletics, weekly appearances on MPTV’s InterCHANGE, and guest hosting on WISN radio.  Realistically the only time I can count on seeing him weekday evenings is during the summer.

 

He gladly and willingly puts in all these extra hours so that I can comfortably stay home with Kyla.  Those additional checks he earns mean treats of all kinds for “his girls” including but not limited to Disney vacations.

 

So am I going to whine that I had to do an extra load of laundry while he was working one of seven sports events in a week?  Um, no.  Would our way of life curdle the milk of my Alverno professors?  Probably.  But then, I don’t really care.  I just laugh at articles in my women’s magazines that advise “talk to your husband about the division of labor.”  Who are they kidding?  Again, I’m not complaining.

 

I don’t remember the first time I saw a copy of the May 1955 edition of Housekeeping Monthly with the tips on how to be a good wife.  I do remember I laughed at many of them.  (Currently I find the most humorous pointers the ones where I should appear well-rested with a fresh ribbon in my hair, and having a house free of clutter.)  Well, it turns out that particular column most likely was fabricated.  If it were true, it probably wouldn’t have raised many eyebrows at that time anyhow.

 

While my current domestic role might make my more “enlightened” and “feminist” friends shudder, I feel that whatever works for your family is what you should continue doing.  If you’re a happy, healthy, well-adjusted bunch that’s what matters; not whether or not your hubby can sort whites or find the can of Pledge.

 

Having said that I am going to offer my own opinion of a family most of America either loves or hates.   Actually I’m not going to offer an opinion of the family per se, just Michelle Duggar’s tips for a happy marriage.  Since the rest of the world is weighing in on her document, I might as well.  (I will admit I have never watched a single episode of “19 kids.”  I honestly have no desire to.  I neither like or dislike them but I can’t STAND any sort of reality show.)

 

Now, I love God.  And I love my husband.  I find it easy to agree with research that finds spouses who share faith & attend church have stronger marriages.  But really?  One page of this document is more disturbing than the one before!  Our chores & home responsibilities might seem archaic to some but our relationship certainly isn’t.  Kevin & I are a team.  We don’t make any sort of decision without consulting each other.  We support each other in every way possible.  When it comes to the things that really matter, we truly are a 50-50 pair.  When I was reading her “advice” all I could think of was this:

 

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